But I Don't *Want* to go Read the Transcripts of the Nuremburg Trials.

Arg! Must plot out rest of pirate/smuggler/spy novel! Only, I suck at generating underhanded political schemes, and the fact that, in my alternate 17th/18th century Europe, there are two parallel Christian Churches and Spain is being ruled by Muslims only makes it harder. How does Harry Turtledove do it?

And to think that this was all begun because I wanted to write about a sexy, one-eyed pirate and have bad guys torture him.

So I'm procrastinating and practicing outline-writing-avoidance (also research paper research avoidance X three) by working on my Last of the Mohicans plotbunny. Unfortunately, success there is also limited, because Uncas and Hawkeye are simply refusing to have sex (Dude, Nathaniel. I've read The Deerslayer, not to mention read Last of the Mohicans three times. You're gay. You are. Now go have hot monkey sex with the cute Indian. You know you want to).

Have I ever mentioned that James Fenimore Cooper's stilted dialogue makes my eyeballs bleed?

And speeking of bleeding eyeballs, all of you Neal Gaiman fans who've seen OUaTiM need to go read rokeon's crossover. One word: Corinthian.