elspethdixon (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
elspethdixon) wrote2005-11-03 04:01 pm
elspethdixon) wrote2005-11-03 04:01 pm
Extensive whining about the slashlessness of my new fandom.
This past summer, I added a new fandom to my list of things I read and occasionally write for, and, for the first time ever, have found myself occupying the position of “only slasher in the fandom.” Said fandom (Lonesome Dove: The Outlaw Years) would appear to be ripe for slash. After all, it features three very attractive male leads who have intense emotional connections to one another. Some of those connections are negative, but since when has that been a barrier to hot m/m pr0n? Plus, Clay Mosby, one of said male leads, is played by Eric McCormack, the same actor who plays Will on Will & Grace. Except in this series, he has long, curly hair and pretty 19th century clothing. And it’s entirely possible that his character was sexually assaulted while in a Civil War POW camp (that he was brutally physically attacked in said camp is canon—the details of the attack are left suspiciously vague). And he has a sexy accent. And did I mention the pretty hair? I’m telling you, people, Mosby is a slasher’s wet dream.
And yet, bizarrely, no slash featuring him exists (barring one PWP written by a Magnificent Seven slasher and one AU story involving vampires). Certainly it doesn’t exist on the tiny handful of mailing lists that compromise the whole of the online fandom. What does exists is a scattering of Mary Sue-ridden het fics (and decent het) and a plethora of gen. Some of it is good gen. Much of it is gen I like. But I find myself pining for angsty slash epics starring the main male antagonists and no-reedeeming-value-whatsoever-PWPs where the two female characters in the series hook up. What can I say? Harry Potter and PotC have spoiled me.
In other circumstances, I might be tempted to write them myself, but the responses to tentative feelers I’ve put out (cleverly disguised as jokes) have given me the impression that the reason slash is nonexistent in this particular bit of the Old West is because the other fans think it’s icky and Wrong. And out of character, and demeaning, and insert all of the other anti-slash arguments you’ve ever seen here.
Because I am an approval whore, and because I don’t want the mailing lists that are my only source of and venue for LD fanfic to descend into bitter flame wars and wank, I’ve kept my mouth firmly shut on all slash-related musings, meta, jokes, plotbunnnies, etc. Of necessity, this means I also self-censor observations on the hotness of female characters. Outing myself as bi would likely have the same effect as posting that slash epic no one’s writing.
I can pass for straight—after all, I myself believed I was straight until I hit college (actually, I used to worry that I was asexual, since I had no compelling interest in romantic relationships and didn’t find guys that much more attractive than girls. I eventually realized that this was because guy and girls were equally hot). My family doesn’t know I’m bisexual. The people I interact with at work don’t know I’m bisexual. A hefty section of fandom likely doesn’t know, either, because they don’t really care enough about my sexuality to inquire, but they certainly know I’m a slasher.
I can pass for straight, but I’ve never had to do it within fandom before. And somehow, misrepresenting my sexuality to other fans just feels weird, in a way that flat out lying to my family about it doesn’t. And sticking firmly to the gen-and-het-only topic list means that some of the ways in which I interpret canon are flat out barred from the discussion.
This wouldn’t necessarily be a problem, were it not for the fact that I seriously think there’s some degree of sexual attraction (albeit sublimated attraction) between two of the male leads, and tend to interpret scenes containing the two of them accordingly. Also, I’m pretty sure that at least one male lead is bisexual (or at least willing to flirt with other men to get what he wants), and tend to analyse his character and motivations with that factored in. Nobody else shares these opinions, most aren’t even willing to hear them aired, and occasionally I’m left feeling like I speak a different language, or am, just possibly, watching a different show.
Is that how all of those “het only, please” people feel when they look at, say, the PotC fandom?
Also, why haven’t any slashers other than me and the couple of people I’ve pimped into the series discovered this show and formed lists/lj communities of their own?
And yet, bizarrely, no slash featuring him exists (barring one PWP written by a Magnificent Seven slasher and one AU story involving vampires). Certainly it doesn’t exist on the tiny handful of mailing lists that compromise the whole of the online fandom. What does exists is a scattering of Mary Sue-ridden het fics (and decent het) and a plethora of gen. Some of it is good gen. Much of it is gen I like. But I find myself pining for angsty slash epics starring the main male antagonists and no-reedeeming-value-whatsoever-PWPs where the two female characters in the series hook up. What can I say? Harry Potter and PotC have spoiled me.
In other circumstances, I might be tempted to write them myself, but the responses to tentative feelers I’ve put out (cleverly disguised as jokes) have given me the impression that the reason slash is nonexistent in this particular bit of the Old West is because the other fans think it’s icky and Wrong. And out of character, and demeaning, and insert all of the other anti-slash arguments you’ve ever seen here.
Because I am an approval whore, and because I don’t want the mailing lists that are my only source of and venue for LD fanfic to descend into bitter flame wars and wank, I’ve kept my mouth firmly shut on all slash-related musings, meta, jokes, plotbunnnies, etc. Of necessity, this means I also self-censor observations on the hotness of female characters. Outing myself as bi would likely have the same effect as posting that slash epic no one’s writing.
I can pass for straight—after all, I myself believed I was straight until I hit college (actually, I used to worry that I was asexual, since I had no compelling interest in romantic relationships and didn’t find guys that much more attractive than girls. I eventually realized that this was because guy and girls were equally hot). My family doesn’t know I’m bisexual. The people I interact with at work don’t know I’m bisexual. A hefty section of fandom likely doesn’t know, either, because they don’t really care enough about my sexuality to inquire, but they certainly know I’m a slasher.
I can pass for straight, but I’ve never had to do it within fandom before. And somehow, misrepresenting my sexuality to other fans just feels weird, in a way that flat out lying to my family about it doesn’t. And sticking firmly to the gen-and-het-only topic list means that some of the ways in which I interpret canon are flat out barred from the discussion.
This wouldn’t necessarily be a problem, were it not for the fact that I seriously think there’s some degree of sexual attraction (albeit sublimated attraction) between two of the male leads, and tend to interpret scenes containing the two of them accordingly. Also, I’m pretty sure that at least one male lead is bisexual (or at least willing to flirt with other men to get what he wants), and tend to analyse his character and motivations with that factored in. Nobody else shares these opinions, most aren’t even willing to hear them aired, and occasionally I’m left feeling like I speak a different language, or am, just possibly, watching a different show.
Is that how all of those “het only, please” people feel when they look at, say, the PotC fandom?
Also, why haven’t any slashers other than me and the couple of people I’ve pimped into the series discovered this show and formed lists/lj communities of their own?