I don't so much want to see someone "fix" anything as I do want to read casefile-style fic and hot John/anyone pr0n -- the sort of "canon is awesome; now I want more stuff just like it, but with sex in" reaction.

I've actually never seen the DVD at all -- I only saw it in the theaters, where I was amazed to find that the movie I'd gone to basically for the purpose of mocking it was actually pretty good.